Things I've learned from my 4 year old nephew

Good days are inevitably followed by bad ones

Ignoring annoying behavior works great at home - not so great in public

Kids don't like movies, they like A movie, so get used to watching it ALL THE TIME

Favorite food one day = poison the next

Excited, enthusiastic praise works wonders, but the promise of exciting adventures (like going to the pool) works miracles

Looking at pictures/videos of themselves is even better than the favorite movie (and will be looked at/watched with just as much regularity)

There will ALWAYS be days/times you want to throw your child out a window, but they will always be out shined by the amazing moments when s/he curls on your lap and says "I sure loves you" or kisses you good bye and exclaimes "see you later crocodile" or even better, makes up fantastic pet names for you like "Linny Bug" (from my neice Caroline) and "Banaida Lindsay" (banaida = banana, from Evan the 4 year old nephew)

Finally, it's always worth it :)

Bitter Sweet

Going through this process is simply increadible, I'm sure it's the same for any couple planning to start their family. Thinking up meaningful and adorable names, swearing you'll never make your baby wear the same horrible thing your parents made you wear, cooing over baby toys and checking safety standards on the newest high chairs. It all just takes over your life, but in an exciting and fun way.

Then you stop and think, you worry about the horrible people in the world, the state of the nation, the economy, failing schools and abismal health care. All parents worry about these things, vague fears becoming real through the eyes of your unborn (in our case unconceived) child.

Finally you realize you have to worry about hiring a lawyer to assure your wife will be considered the childs parent, because in this state she is not allowed to be on his/her birth certificate, because she cannot legally adopt her own child. You worry what will happen if you are gone and your child needs to go to the hospital, will they allow your wife to make emergency medical desions? Who will claim our child on our single filed taxes, since we cannot legally marry, therefor we cannot file together? Will our family and friends look for signs in OUR child's face of the sperm donor? Will they treat my wife as a mother, or "other gaurdian"?

Not all couples have to face these issues, these worries, these sleepless nights. Not all couples have to be terrified that another hateful law will be passed that could rip their family apart. Our family is not different from any other family. We have the same expectations, fears, hopes and dreams for our soon to be child. But we face crushing injustice every day, we fight hate with every expression of love. We face these challenges because it is the only option we have, because our love outweighs the hate.

I hope that some of the straight couples out there will take a moment to realize how special their freedom to express their love is. How similar we all are. And perhaps even take the chance to open your hearts to a family like ours, to reach a hand out in acceptance, to take a moment to let love over come hate. And eventually, stories like mine will fade into history. 

Step 1

According to EVERYONE the first step is to chart your cycle, so keep track of symptoms, menstruation and test for ovulation with an OPK (Ovulation predictor kit). I have been charting my cycle for about 6 months, but today I got my OPK in the mail! I ordered a bulk off brand from amazon.com I got 100 ovulation tests and 20 pregnancy tests for about $10! WIN!

According to my handy dandy OvuView phone app (I DEFINITELY recommend this it's fantastic!), I am currently in my fertile stage, so as soon as the package got here I figured, what the hey, might as well give them a try! The directions are super easy: pee in cup, dip stick in cup, count to 30, remove, wait, look for 2 lines...and what do you know, 2 LINES! My first try and I get a positive! That HAS to be a good sign!

We aren't inseminating yet, BUT our journey has barely begun and we are off to a fantastic start! I will use my OPK for the next couple days to chart my ovulation hormones (they have some real name of course, but I would have to google it and make sure the spelling is right...blah blah blah, you know what I mean)to get a peak time frame for this cycle. THEN continue the process the next couple months to get a solid ovulation time frame for when we start inseminating.

We are planning to start inseminating this fall, so we have a spring baby (and I don't have to walk around 7 months pregnant in 90 degree weather!) so we have 6 months to go. We have tentatively decided on using a KD (known donor) who is a friend of ours and has offered his sperm to us (what a kind soul). We will be doing at home ICI (itracervical insemination), basically a cup of swimmers and a needless syringe injected as close to the cervix as possible.

We are still doing LOTS of research on all the possible ways for us to conceive and I will be sure to share what we learn!

Introduction

I have been informed that I should document, as much as possible, the journey my darling wife and I take to conceive our first child. As I am one to normally ignore good advice, this will be a change! THUS advice taken to heart, here we go...

Tif and I have been together 4 years (5 in October), we live in Ohio (one of the archaic, back words states, where same sex marriage is illegal), we have 2 dogs and a sugar glider (like a flying squirrel but cuter). We have 2 nephews (Evan 4 and Max 1) and 1 niece (Caroline 2 1/2). With all these babies around (and my biological clock ringing off the chart) we decided it's time to have our own.

For those of you who don't know, it's not exactly easy for to women to make a child (we lack one essential ingredient) SO I will be documenting our journey to find, utilize and create life with 2 lesbians and a vial of sperm!

Welcome to 2 lesbians and a baby!